They say patchy fog is the most dangerous kind for driving in.One minute you cant see in front of your nose the next its clear.In the clear air you will be tempted to speed up only to be confronted again by the thick pea soup that slows you right down again.
Over the last few weeks I have been living through that same type of fog,most of the time you cannot see a thing then suddenly you feel like everything is as clear as a bell.

Up until now this has been my experience of trying to take some time out from church leadership.Some of this is my own fault as I find it hard to sit still and wait.But some of it is also due to feeling like I had to get involved again because of the serious situation we were in.going along to out team meeting only thickened the fog and on the way home my prayer was simply one of HELP!!

I have no doubts about what God has called me to .So I suppose the doubts must be about where he has put me.And if after 20 odd years it might be time to move on.My problem with that is my loyalty to those around I find it almost impossible to think about walking away and leaving them.In fact this only serves to make the fog thicker.

So I have asked for a few more weeks and after a rare moment in the clear last night I have a lot more peace about the future whatever that might be.So in all of this I remain convinced that God is good and that he has plans for all of us that go beyond even our wildest imagination.

I meant to post this a few weeks back but got caught up with holidays and stuff.

I was taken shooting recently by a friend who is new to the church .I was telling him that I needed to find some new ways to relax and spend my down time.he invited me to go shooting with him in a little place in Ayrshire called Moscow.

I went down on a Friday afternoon and met up with Robert who introduced me to the owner of of Cowans Law Jay.We grabbed 100 shells and of we went.I could see that Robert knew what he was doing by the way he handled the gun .I was a bit nervous having never fired a gun before.After the first 10 -15 shells missed there target by a mile I hit my first clay.I didn't take long for me to get my eye in.I really enjoyed the time there and it didn't take that long to get through 100 shells.They have a great set up with fishing in the small loch as well as corporate stuff for the big boys.

So thanks Robert for a good day out .I think I might head back down again with my son at the weekend.

Yesterday I left a tweet that I was going to see The Boss in Glasgow.I was looking forward to the gig and had high hopes.I must admit that I'm not the biggest fan in the world but surely that wouldn't matter.After all Ive been to many gigs where I didn't really know the band .

How wrong can you be.The worst gig I have ever had the misfortune to pay £50 for.We were quite a bit away from the stage but even taking that into account the sound was crap.Just not loud enough it was like sitting out in the garden with some music playing in the house.Now I'm not the youngest guy in the world anymore but when the folk next to me took out there sandwich and binoculars I knew we were in trouble.It was like being in some OAP club.I have been to gigs with my own father 69 and he has 10 times more life in him.So all thoughts of having a dance went right out the window.

Then came to music every song started like it would be great but after 2 hours every song sounded like one great big song.I heard 2 songs that raised the bar.Outlaw Pete and the River then we could not take it any longer and left.

My over all feeling is that for some reason it seems cool to say the boss is great but by the look on most peoples faces this is just an illusion.Sure there was great energy and the longest set I've ever heard but over all I could only give him a 2/10 and that's mainly for effort .its been 28 years since they last came to Glasgow I hope they don't hurry back.Now bring on Green day.

Last night I rememberd my wedding vows "in sickness and in health".My wife has had some health concerns of late not least having surgery a week ago.So it been down to me and a few friends to look after her,she was in constant pain before the op and that pain will hopefully go when the stiches are taken out in a weeks time.

Not sure if im cut out for nursing but I have found myself doing things that I never thought I would be able to.In a moment last night I was reminded that I married this amazing woman and took a vow to be there in sickness and in health.God just has a way of gentley reminding of us of the things we have promised .It was also a time to give thanks because its very easy to take each other for granted and forget what a gift of love we have been giving.

So changing a few dressings and staying up all night (well almost) making endless cups of tea as well as doing the house work (I want to kill the man who invented the Iron) this is love .Thats all from nurse Ratchet>

I just got back from a week in Disney Paris with my Son my nephew and my sons friend.It felt a bit like being in the twilight zone and after few days I was craving adult conversation.I did though have a great time in the land of the mouse.

But holidays are strange time they say you should never make and big choices for your life while on holiday.I say why not .You feel different and see things differently you feel detached from that treadmill that drives you all year round and you have time to see the world and God in a different light.I reflected on the time I have spent trying to plant a church in the inner city and wondered if it is possible.Thinking back over the years and all the knocks we have taken and asking "will I still pay the price?"Increasingly the answer is no.

I don't want to give up on my faith or run away from God but I don't think I want to pay any more.Its time to think about my family and my own sanity its time to think about what they need instead of others.In fact its time to have some time.Time to seek God time to hear him time to spend with my hurting wife time to heal family relationships time to strengthen what I have and time for just being.

I have taken a month of church and it feels good.Normally I would miss it and be thinking about what was going on and what needed to be done.But now if I'm honest I really don't care whats going on.At the end of this month I will decide what the future holds for me and my family and I have to say for the first time in a long time I feel relaxed about it.